July #22

why don't i pick on you about something
you're sensitive?
like i don't know
your body
or your looks
or something.
don't pick on me
about my weight
the one thing
that i hate myself for.
my weight
is a constant issue
the worst of all my evils
and you think it's funny
to pick on it,
something you've never said
before tonight.

yes.
let's make fun of me.
the girl that constantly worries
about how her body looks.
my achilles heel
that's the size of the moon
my weak spot.

pick on my weight enough
and you'll make me beleive
i am a fat, lard-induced monster.
i don't understand
why YOU don't understand.

my weight is an issue.
why did you decide tonight
that you could focus on it?
since when did you decide that?

and the thing is
you know how i get
how when i weigh more
i obsess
freak out
can never look good enough

you've seen me gaze at the mirror
turn away in hate
or tears
or come out of a bathroom
feeling ugly

since when did my weight become a target?
since i started losing it?
just because i'm less fat
doesn't mean
i'm more secure.

think before you speak